The Mod Squad

Here we go again: creativity-starved Hollywood recycles an old television show into a full length feature film. This time it’s "The Mod Squad." No wonder there was no surprise when it was announced last week that movie box office receipts were off 26% from the same period last year.

"The Mod Squad" was on for five seasons. It featured three counter-culture young cops back in the days when the word "counter-culture" meant something.

Today you’d find these guys living in Austin or walking around at the mall.

The new version features three juvenile delinquents who are given a second chance to make good with the law by working as undercover cops. There’s Julie (Claire Danes), who with her Gwyneth Paltrow coiffure and skinny body looks like she should be selling jeans at the Gap, not busting crooks.

Pete (Giovanni Ribisi) is the rich boy turned bad. Several times Ribisi brings the audience to laughter, but it seems that he is stuck on playing his mentally retarded character from The Other Sister.

As for Linc (Omar Epps), supposedly the militant one, we have a guy who looks to be over 30 and just back from a stint in the Peace Corps.

The lucky one in this film is Dennis Farina. As the captain who recruits the mod squad, he exits early on with two bullets in the chest. Farina must have had a good horoscope reading that day.

The plot involves the three getting framed for the captain’s murder along with a lame subplot about crooked cops and drugs. The action scenes are incredibly tepid, looking more like outtakes from "Charlie’s Angels."

The only thing worth watching in this film is Linc’s 1973 Lincoln Continental, a car today that would be hard pressed to fit into any garage in The Woodlands. It’s a reminder of why we had an energy crisis back in the 70’s.